8 Questions To Reveal The Truth About You
Uncomfortable, honest questions that are brilliant at making you feel alive again.
ALIVENESS
A philosophy and practice for living fully in the awareness that life is finite.
Let’s start with this reminder: it is easy to unconsciously drift in life.
We unconsciously drift in life because it is easy to unconsciously take life for granted.
We unconsciously take life for granted because we are not in relationship with our mortality, so we therefore assume we have more time to action the things that matter most.
By not acknowledging, on a regular basis, the one thing in life that is guaranteed (death), we forget that life is short, and precious, and we unconsciously… drift. And the things that matter most get postponed.
And then there’s the fear that tells you not to take risks. Just play things safe. Over a life these harden into beliefs about who you are and what you’re capable of, beliefs that were never true, only protective.
All these fears grow from the oldest fear of all, the fear of death. We don’t feel it directly anymore, because most days nothing threatens our lives. But it’s still there, underneath, keeping us small.
So - you take a job that’s meant to be temporary, and somehow it turns into the thing you’ve done for fifteen years. Your passion project remains permanently postponed. There’s a conversation you know you need to have, and you keep not having it.
Or maybe you built something, a business, a career, an identity that once suited you, but over time you changed, but the role didn’t.
You’re not failing while this happens. In fact, you may be busy and you’re good at what you do. It’s just, sometimes, you wake up and find yourself wanting to head in another direction. And after long enough, that realisation can have a way of dimming your spark for life. Your aliveness.
Maybe that describes you right now. Maybe it doesn’t, and you’re happy. Either way these questions are worth sitting with. This isn’t about beating yourself up over the years behind you. It’s just that you always get to choose what happens next, if you’re paying attention.
I call these the Aliveness Questions. They’re not supposed to be comfortable. And they’ve got nothing to do with productivity… they’re about direction and Aliveness, which is exactly why most of us dodge them, because some part of us suspects the answers will ask put us out of our comfort zones.
I come back to these questions every month or so. Before anything big or whenever I get the feeling I’ve drifted. Read them slowly, and don’t rush to get through them. The questions that sting a bit are the ones to stay with FYI.
The Aliveness Questions
1. If I continue living like this, where will I end up?
Your life is shaped by what you repeatedly do, not what you say you want. If nothing changes, your future is already visible.
2. What am I postponing that I know matters?
Most people aren’t confused about what matters. They’re postponing it.
3. Am I living a life I chose, or a life I drifted into?
Shaped by conscious choice, or by expectation, convenience and fear?
4. Where am I choosing comfort over courage?
Comfort keeps life predictable. Courage is what makes it worth living.
5. What am I afraid of, and what is that fear costing me?
Fear stops us starting, leaving, saying, becoming. This makes it visible, and measurable.
6. What do I not want to regret?
Do the Ultimate Meditation and look back from the end of your life. It’s the clearest vantage point there is.
7. Am I spending my life on what actually matters to me?
Your life is what you give your time and attention to. Does that match what you value?
8. What needs to change?
Reflection without change changes nothing. This is the action question.
If you have time, take 10 minutes and write down answers to these. You will be glad you did.
One for your diaries: Live coaching for paid subscribers. If you want a simple 2 minute daily practice to help you step into your fullest life, I will be hosting this live 45 minute session this Sunday August 2nd. Zoom link click here.
And if you haven’t tried the Aliveness practice mini course yet, here it is:
The Aliveness Practice
The pages below are designed to be read in order, one at a time, across a few sittings.
What’s Coming Next?
My first live event. I’m hosting a free two-day virtual event called Drop the Mask, Reclaim Your Life, for anyone ready to stop drifting through another year and finally face the change they’ve been putting off.
A new podcast. I sat down with Daniel Bradley of Braving the Bright Side for an honest conversation about mortality, purpose, and living fully.
Aliveness at Medicine Festival. I’ll be leading an Aliveness workshop at Medicine Festival on Sunday 16th July. If you’re there, come and find me.
One request this week, instead of a closing question.
Out of the 8 Aliveness Questions, which one unsettled you most? Please reply and tell me which, and why. It will inspire others.
Thank you for being here. Make the most of the time you have.
Live happy,
Hoppy
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John Hopkins is a former CEO, filmmaker, soul midwife and druidic bard. As I entered midlife I realised I was living a life that no longer aligned with the person I had become. So I changed direction and created Aliveness. I have a dream that Aliveness becomes as impactful as Mindfulness. A daily practice that helps people live more bravely, leave fewer regrets and build a more present and generous world.
